Haunted Memories
by GoneDrake
Summary: Sasori is devastated after Deidara's death, his life shattered into pieces. But little does he know, Deidara's alive, but has no rememberance of his past. No memories of the accident, Sasori, anything. What will happen when they reunite? DeiXSori Yaoi
1. Prologue

**Hey guys ^^  
I just felt like writing this fanfic, and I'd really like to hear your opinions! I don't mind criticism, just keep it a little friendly, m'kay? XD  
Yeah, I'm gonna continue writing, just because I love Deidara :) and this story, I think. But after a few chapters, I might lose motivation, and if I don't get any reviews, I'll have no reason to continue. :'(**

**So please review, so that I'll be able to know if I should continue or not! Thanks!**

**By the way, this is the INTRODUCTION. So... yeah. It's supposed to be short. ^^**

* * *

Water churning all around, filling my mouth, nose, ears. I can't see; only darkness surrounds my struggling body. Kicking, flailing, every frantic motion harder to do then the last. It's getting so tiring…

My lungs ache, shouting frantic messages at my mind. I struggle to take a breath, inhaling nothing but water, and curse at the black dots now crowding my vision. They push my thoughts back into my head. All is silent…

_No._

_I can't die like this._

I'm growing weary. One last push of my body, and I've gone no farther then before. There's no up or down. Darkness is everywhere, churning water now filling my lungs. So, so cold…

_No._

I open my mouth to scream, but nothing comes out. I'm engulfed in a black haze. I can't move, body motionless, and can feel my eyes rolling to the back of my head. Weights push down on my limbs, and slowly, I'm sucked into a deep sleep. Unconsciousness.

_Sasori._

_Forgive me._

Suddenly everything goes dark.

* * *

"Hey, Deidara! Wake up!"

I awoke with a loud gasp, clutching my sheets with both hands. From the dark shadows cast across the room, it's apparent how late at night it is. Flipping a strand of sweaty blond hair from my face, I took a number of deep breaths, heart beating frantically with every one.

I lowered my eyes. My roommate had been woken by my screams. Again.

"Sorry," I muttered, cheeks growing hot. My voice was barely above a whisper. The nightmares weren't something I could control, and they had been coming more and more frequently. Who knew how long it'd be before they got worse? "I was… yelling again, wasn't I?"

"More like shrieking, Dei." Sarushi Konei, my roommate for the past year, stood over my bed. His usually emotionless face was deep with worry, eyebrows creased, dark eyes concerned. He moved back onto the edge of his bed, legs swinging. "You've been having the same nightmare for over six months."

I shook my head. "They're not always the same," I tried to steady my breathing, with no success. It had always been incredibly difficult to hide my fear, and it was all I could do to stop my lip from trembling. "I-I'm sorry I woke you. But I'm fine, hmm? I wish you'd stop getting so concerned."

"Deidara." Konei frowned at me, voice firm. He stood up. "Look. I'm just worried about you, that's all. Dreams do have hidden meanings, and… maybe there's more to them then you think."

I clenched my teeth, fear being replaced with anger. I hated being treated with such sympathy, as though I was the one who needed pity.

"You don't know what I think," Frustration tainted my words. "You don't know anything. I'm fine, okay? Just-" My voice wavered. "L-leave me alone, hmm?"


	2. Dead

_Drip drip._

Rain lands on the roof, rolling off in tiny beads. Each droplet contains the reflection of light. Sparkling, shimmering, living. Each tear of water… lives.

_My tears._

_They're dead._

They have no glimmer, no twinkle, no shine. They reflect only darkness, dropping to the ground where they belong. Light has long faded, leaving nothing but shadows. Darkened wisps. There's no life.

_Drip drip._

I lifted my head, eyes peering up towards the sunshine that now flooded the room. Rays on light brightened the space, illuminating the pages of my notebook. They flipped in the wind, a cool breeze coming from the door. I growled.

Getting up, I made my way over to the black curtains. They had been closed the night before, protecting my eyes from the light. Another pathetic attempt from my teammates.

It was a bright day, sky a clear blue. Large green oak trees swayed in the wind, bushels of flowers drifting through the air. The city was bustling with movement, cars speeding down the streets, buses stopped at the corners.

There were people walking outside, in large crowds or in small groups. They were full of joy, a trivial emotion that meant nothing. None of them knew that eventually, their perfect little world would come crashing down. Shattering like the fragile glass it was.

"Sasori!" I stiffened, yanking the curtains closed. Kisame's shadow drifted down the empty hallway. "Sasori, are you still sleeping?"

"Get out." I hissed, glaring as he stepped into my room, his expression worried. He studied my face for a moment before moving towards the window, and pushed the curtains pen. Bright light poured into the area for the second time. "Hey, did you hear me. I said, get out." I motioned towards the door, impatient.

Kisame sighed. "You stayed up last night, didn't you?" He touched my desk, hand brushing over the smooth surface. I quickly snatched my notebook away, glaring, and received a curious look. "Sasori, you need to start sleeping. It does you no good, just writing away, concealing your thoughts and feelings within those pages. You got to start living again. Get up and get out, you know? You're a mess."

His face was impassive, but his eyes revealed his true emotions. Worry, sadness, and pity. So much pity.

I grit my teeth together. "I can do whatever I want. Please, just get out."

"No." Kisame stood firm, surprising me just a little. For the past six months, my teammates had let me be, engulfed in my sorrow. The six months before that had been spent grieving, and even then, I had been left undisturbed.

He sighed. "It's time for you to leave the past behind, Sasori. We've given you time to mourn, to isolate yourself from everyone else, to remember. But you've got to move on, man. You have to start living again." Kisame stopped, thoughtful. "You have to start over, and forget about what happened last year-"

"Just don't, okay?" I was now standing, hands curled into tight fists at my sides. I barred my teeth. Anger shot through my voice. "Drop it. I don't need to forget anything, anything at all. You have no right to come in here, dragging your pity for me behind you. Just leave me alone. I'm fine."

Kisame laughed; a cold, saddened sound. "You're… fine?" He snarled, eyes narrowing in anger. "Look at what you've become, Sasori! You've stayed in this room for the past year, doing nothing but wallow in your own self pity! When was the last time you saw the outdoors, huh? Remember? The outdoors? The old Sasori would wake up every morning, leaving us all in the dust, and live. You were always so good at finding the special parts of the world! But now… you're nothing!"

I dug my nails into my palms until I could feel the blood dripping across my skin. My eyes blazed with fury.

"The old Sasori?" I yelled, kicking over the wooden desk next to my bed. I ripped the blinds closed, nearly cracking the window, hands shaking. "The old Sasori? The old Sasori isn't here! He'll never be here again! He's dead, okay? I'm dead. I died the moment Deidara disappeared, even if it was only slowly at first. Every day that he's gone, every day since the accident, I spend wishing he'd walk on right through that door." I pointed to the entranceway, wiping furiously at my eyes. I knew that no tears would come, but by now, it had become a natural instinct. "That door… He left… and never came back…"

"Sasori…" Kisame's expression had suddenly gone soft, sympathetic. He placed a hand gently on my shoulder. "Sasori, you know that-"

"Deidara will come back," I shrugged off his hand, voice dropping to a cracked whisper. "H-he'll walk right through those doors. H-he'll come home. He'd never leave his family, his teammates, m-me." My tone wavered.

Kisame took a deep breath, looking away, as if in pain. "Sasori," He spoke quietly. "Deidara… Deidara is dead. He died the night of April 4th, 2008, in the tragic accident of which you are well aware. He's not coming back, Sasori. Deidara is… dead."

My shoulders slumped, feeling the weight of his words. Deidara… My lip trembled. Deidara… is dead.

I had known the truth since the day he died, but I knew that he would come back. Every time someone spoke of Deidara's death, I would be pushed deeper and deeper into numbness, trapped by the weight of my sorrow. I had died along with him – nothing left of me but the body of a hollow ghost. There would never be feeling, never be light. I would never be whole again, not without Deidara, my Deidara, at my side.

"Fine." I heard Kisame mutter. His voice drifted through my daze, barely a whisper, pushed away by the darkness. He took a step towards the door. "I'll go. But you can't stay locked up forever, Sasori. You can't."

And then he walked away.

I didn't even bother to watch him leave.


	3. Days on End

**Please read and review? Thanks :) I'd appreciate it *Does a little dance* I finally finished another chapter... (I've been very busy)**

**Disclaimer: All Naruto characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto.**

* * *

Deidara stretched, yawning as his eyes were blinded by the bright sunlight. It danced across his room; chasing away the shadows and illuminating his roommate's face. It was morning.

"Ugh, I'm still so tired, un." Slowly stepping out of bed, he reached towards his closet. In it lay a large array of black uniforms – specific clothing for the residents of the house. "Why do we have to get up so early?"

Konei yawned as well. "Dei, it's nine o'clock. Not that early, you know." He had begun to make his bed, smoothing out the stiff black sheets. "You're just irritated 'cause you didn't get enough sleep last night. What with your dreams and all."

"Un," The blond shrugged, pulling on a loose pair of black jeans. Following suit was a baggy black t-shirt, a hoodie, and a ragged pair of running shoes. "Still, it'd be nice to sleep in for the entire morning, you know? Meeting together for breakfast every morning is starting to get very annoying, un."

"Oh well, that's life." His roommate waved to Deidara before closing the bathroom door, getting ready to shower. His feet could be heard walking across the creaky tile floor, informing the people downstairs of what he was doing. "I'll be down in five."

Deidara nodded, stepping into the upper hallway. It was a long, winding corridor, leading down towards five different doors. A dark brown staircase stood in the middle, squeaking as he tip-toed down the steps.

_Kyoko and Hotaru's room… the first door to the left. He quizzed himself silently, coming to a stop. It was still quite confusing, remembering which rooms were those of the residents, and which were not. Then to the right… Daisuke and Kaede. The first bathroom… Our room, then the storage room… Another bathroom… And at the very top of the stairs, Master Yameo and Mei._

"Hi, Dei." Deidara swiveled around as Kyoko passed me on the stairs, her dark blue hair bouncing around her shoulders. She smiled, pausing in front of her doorway. "You'd better hurry on down for breakfast. Master Yameo isn't in a very good mood."

"Un?" The owner of the house, Andaru Yameo, spent his mornings downstairs, helping his wife, Mei, with breakfast. He was usually a stone faced, knowledgeable man, and rarely got angry. Whenever there was such tension, however, there was always a reason. "Who's got him angry now, hmm?"

Kyoko rolled her eyes. "Daisuke, who else? Bringing up those people he encountered in the village yesterday, you know, those strangers?"

The blond nodded, frowning.

"Well, he wanted to head out on a mission to go and track them down." She placed her hands on her hips. "Supposedly, there was something "odd about them." Anyways, Yameo, being the over protective adult he is, flipped out. He refused to let either one of us go out and search, for safety reasons."

Deidara studied Kyoko's expression in concern, noting how her cheerful attitude had taken a quick turn. Her yellow green eyes were blazing.

"Hmm," His eyebrows pulled together in thought. "So… Master Yameo considers them as a threat?"

"Mhm." She nodded, then opened the wooden door. "But whoever they are, they're still in the village. I know it. And Daisuke's not gonna let them go without a fight."

Deidara slipped gave her one last glance, then slipped down the stairs, leaving Kyoko muttering to herself. He had no idea of what was going on in the village, but if the intruders were still there, he wanted to find out who they were. Even though Master Yameo was their guardian, Deidara was of legal age to do whatever he wanted. No one could tell him where and when he couldn't go.

"Good morning, Dei." Mei sat at the breakfast table, sipping a cup of green tea. Her long black hair was placed neatly in a bun, dark brown eyes warm and friendly. "I see you're up on time."

The blond smiled. "'Morning, Mei." He walked over to the kitchen counter and, after grabbing a glass, poured himself a cup of orange juice. "Yeah, didn't sleep that well last night, un." He motioned to the dark circles that rimmed his eyes. They were a deep purple – slightly pin at the ends.

"You should get some sleep, then." She lowered her voice a little. "I'm sure Yameo wouldn't mind if you-"

"Deidara, I need you out here, please!" Master Yameo's aggravated tone cut into the woman's suggestion, loud and firm. Deidara sighed. "Hurry up, now!"

Mei frowned. "You really ought to-"

"I'm fine, un." Deidara was already halfway out the front door, heading towards the training field. Whatever the teacher wanted, it was going to involve some tough work. "Besides, I wanted to talk to him about something anyways, hmm..."

---------

"Sasori, get your fucking sorry ass out of you room, now!"

Sasori groaned, and pulled his bed sheets over his head. He flattened himself against the side wall, hoping to remain hidden from the rest of his teammates.

It had been a few days now, where he refused to come out of his room. Kisame would pass his meals from under the door. Sasori would pass the plates back, cleaned. Then he'd crawl back into bed, unbothered for the rest of the afternoon.

And so on.

"Seriously, Akasuna, I fucking mean it!" Hidan's anger was apparent, and he pounded his fist against the wooden door. Sasori swore he could hear the scrape of the blond's scythe against the tiles floor. "You have 'till the count of three to get your ass out here. One, two, thr-

Sasori stood at the doorway, looking like a ghost awoken from a deep slumber. He glared at Hidan, red hair flat and matted. His skin was an almost translucent white, cheeks hollowed, whole body small and meager. His eyes were encircled by deep purple rings, his pupils gone dull. He looked dead.

"What the hell do you want?" Sasori spoke in a monotonous tone, voice barely above a whisper. He blinked slowly, gazing up at the blond.

"I…" Hidan held up a tray weakly, the hearty smell of food making Sasori's stomach turn. He clasped a hand out his mouth, the other darting to his midriff. "… brought some, uh, food. Hey, are you okay?" He touched the red head's shoulder.

Sasori recoiled in an instant, whole body tensing. Taking a shaky step backwards, her grabbed the tray, voice venomous. "Fine. I'm fine. Now get out."

"You don't look fine." Hidan eyed him suspiciously. Sasori could feel his teammate's stare scanning his face. "In fact, you like hell. Like death, Akasuna."

"Don't call me…" Sasori's voice drifted off, and he gave a slight shake of his head. "Just go. Please." His empty eyes were almost pleading.

"I don't-" Hidan caught Sasori's expression, and with a brief expression of shock, receeded. He paused at the doorway, then turned towards the red head again. "Don't go insane on me, you like fucker. You hear me? I swear, if you-"

Sasori closed the door.

* * *

***Looks at you with big eyes* So? Did you like it?**

**This chapter was a little short, but they will get longer. I've been really busy, like I said before, and have lots of other stories to update. But for the next few weeks, I'm pretty much free, so I'll have lots of time to write, write, write. Mua ha ha.**

**Oh, and I apologize for Hidan's mouth. It might get worse XD Sorry.**


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